150 Family-Friendly Jokes
Are you looking for fun, kid-friendly jokes that will make both children and parents laugh out loud? You’ve come to the right place! Below, you’ll find 150 unique, family-approved jokes that are perfect for brightening up any day. Whether you’re seeking silly riddles, goofy puns, or light-hearted one-liners, this ultimate list has you covered. Enjoy reading, sharing, and laughing together!
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because it wasn’t peeling well!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
Why was the math book sad?
It had too many problems.
How do you make a lemon drop?
Just let it fall!
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese!
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honey combs!
What do you call a cow that plays the guitar?
A moo-sician!
Why can’t you tell a joke while ice skating?
Because the ice might crack up!
What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie?
A pie-thon!
Why did the picture go to jail?
Because it was framed!
What did one plate say to the other plate?
Dinner’s on me!
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
A tuba toothpaste!
Why was the stadium so cool?
It was filled with fans!
Why did the pony get sent to his room?
He wouldn’t stop horsing around!
What do elves learn in school?
The elf-abet!
Why can’t a pirate ever finish the alphabet?
Because he always gets stuck at “C”!
How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?
With a pumpkin patch!
Why did the robot go on vacation?
He needed to recharge his batteries!
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
Why was the tomato embarrassed?
It saw the salad dressing!
How do you talk to a giant?
Use big words!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was two-tired!
What kind of music do bunnies like?
Hip-hop!
What do you call a duck that gets straight A’s?
A wise quacker!
Why did the student eat his homework?
The teacher said it was a piece of cake!
How does the ocean say hello?
It waves!
Why was the horse so happy?
It lived in a stable environment!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
Why did the melon jump into the lake?
It wanted to be a watermelon!
What did the big flower say to the small flower?
“Hey, bud!”
How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogie in it!
Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot!
What do you call a dog magician?
A Labracadabrador!
Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because it felt crummy!
How does a penguin build its house?
It igloos it together!
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels!
What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious!
Why did the computer keep sneezing?
It had a virus!
How do trees access the internet?
They log on!
What do ghosts like to eat in the summer?
I scream!
Why couldn’t the pirate play cards?
Because he was sitting on the deck!
How do you keep a bull from charging?
Take away its credit card!
What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back?
A stick!
How do you organize a space party?
You planet!
Why did the dog join the circus?
He was a great barker!
Why is Cinderella so bad at soccer?
She always runs away from the ball!
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it!
Why did the coffee file a police report?
It got mugged!
What do you call a pencil with two erasers?
Pointless!
Why couldn’t the pony sing a lullaby?
She was a little hoarse!
What do you get when you put three ducks in a box?
A box of quackers!
Why did the mushroom always get invited to parties?
Because he was a real fungi!
What do you call an alligator detective?
An investi-gator!
Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because it was stuffed!
What did the zero say to the eight?
“Nice belt!”
Why did the music teacher need a ladder?
To reach the high notes!
What do you call a belt made entirely of watches?
A waist of time!
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
How do you make an octopus laugh?
With ten-tickles!
What do you get when you cross a frog and a dog?
A croaker spaniel!
Why was the baby strawberry crying?
Because its parents were in a jam!
What do you call a singing laptop?
A Dell!
Why can’t you play hide-and-seek with mountains?
They always peak!
How do you talk to a fish?
You drop it a line!
Why did the banana split?
Because it saw the sundae coming!
What did the calculator say to the student?
You can count on me!
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze!
What do you call a factory that makes okay products?
A satisfactory!
Why did the gym close down?
It just didn’t work out!
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite!
Why was the belt sent to jail?
For holding up the pants!
What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
“Do you smell carrots?”
Why did the student bring a ladder to school?
Because she heard it was a high school!
How does a scientist freshen her breath?
With experi-mints!
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
A dino-snore!
Why did the bird go to the hospital?
It needed tweetment!
What do you call a bear caught in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
Why did the music note go to jail?
It was in treble!
What did the left eye say to the right eye?
“Between us, something smells!”
How do you make an artichoke laugh?
You tickle its heart!
What do you call an unpredictable camera?
A loose Canon!
Why did the skeleton go to the barbecue?
To get a spare rib!
What do you call a group of killer whales playing music?
An orca-stra!
Why can’t you trust stairs?
They’re always up to something!
How do you get a squirrel to like you?
Act like a nut!
Why did the chicken join the band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call a shoe made out of a banana?
A slipper!
Why did the dog do so well in school?
He was the teacher’s pet!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
What did one egg say to the other egg?
“Let’s get cracking!”
Why did the spider visit the computer?
To check on his web site!
How do you make a bandstand?
Take away their chairs!
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick!
Why did the cat join the Red Cross?
It wanted to be a first-aid kit-ten!
Why did the triangle look so sad?
Because it’s never right!
What kind of button won’t unbutton?
A belly button!
Why did the fish get bad grades?
It was below C level!
What do you call a snail on a ship?
A snailor!
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
De-calf-inated!
Why was the cat so agitated?
Because it was in a bad mewd!
What’s black, white, and red all over?
A sunburned zebra!
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
To get to the other side!
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose!
What’s the strongest type of bird?
The crane!
What do you call a pig who knows karate?
A pork chop!
Where do sheep go on vacation?
The Baa-hamas!
Why can’t you tell an egg a joke?
It might crack up!
Why was the piano at the school so happy?
It had a lot of keys to success!
How do you catch a whole school of fish?
With a bookworm!
Why couldn’t the leopard play hide-and-seek?
Because he was always spotted!
What do you call a cow that can’t moo?
A milk dud!
Where do pencils go on vacation?
Pencil-vania!
Why do crabs never share their toys?
Because they’re shellfish!
How do you make a hot dog stand?
Take away its chair!
What do you call an underwater spy?
James Pond!
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because her students were so bright!
Why was the cat afraid of the tree?
Because of its bark!
Why did the fisherman put peanut butter into the sea?
To go with the jellyfish!
Why did the bread get into a fight?
It was a little crusty!
What kind of keys do kids love to carry?
Cookies!
Why did the watch teacher always get good timing?
He had second-hand information!
Why did the bird bring a microphone?
Because it liked to tweet in public!
What do you call a clown who can’t stand up?
A sit-com!
What do you call a group of giraffes?
A tower!
Why was the broom late for class?
It overswept!
Why do vampires always seem sick?
Because they’re coffin!
Why did the balloon visit the therapist?
It was feeling a little deflated!
Why did the barber win the race?
He knew a shortcut!
Why did the carpenter bring a hammer to bed?
He heard it was time to hit the sack!
What did one magnet say to the other?
“I find you very attractive!”
Why did the orange lose the race?
It ran out of juice!
What did the policeman say to his belly button?
“You’re under a vest!”
Why did the student bring scissors to class?
He wanted to cut corners in geometry!
How do you fix a broken tomato?
With tomato paste!
Why did the bird get detention?
For tweeting during class!
Why did the policeman go to the baseball game?
He heard someone was stealing bases!
Why can’t Elsa have a balloon?
Because she’ll let it go!
Why did the burglar take a shower?
He wanted to make a clean getaway!
What did the traffic light say to the car?
“Don’t look now, I’m changing!”
Why do hummingbirds hum?
Because they don’t know the words!
What do you call a cow in a tornado?
A milkshake!
What did the gardener plant a light bulb for?
He wanted to grow a power plant!
What do you call a snowman in July?
A puddle!
Why was the baby ant so confused?
All his uncles were ants!
How do you cut the sea in half?
Use a sea-saw!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why did the smartphone need glasses?
Because it lost all its contacts!
Why did the cat sit on the computer?
It wanted to keep an eye on the mouse!
What did the hamburger name its daughter?
Patty!
We hope these 150 jokes filled your day with giggles and grins! Feel free to share them with friends, family, and classmates to spread the laughter. For more kid-friendly fun, educational games, and entertaining content, be sure to visit Prongo.com regularly. Here at Prongo, we love bringing smiles to kids and parents alike with creative, safe, and engaging material. Enjoy and keep laughing!
