🐾 Clean laughs for curious kids
Top 100 Animal Jokes for Kids
Read Top 100 Animal Jokes for Kids on Prongo. Enjoy clean dog, cat, elephant, frog, fish, farm animal, and wildlife riddles with silly punchlines.
Barnyard Banter 31 jokes
Cows, chickens, pigs, ponies, and their farmyard friends.
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Joke #1
What do you call a crazy chicken?
PunchlineA cuckoo-cluck.
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Joke #5
Where do you take sick ponies?
PunchlineTo the horsepital.
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Joke #7
If you had fifteen cows and five goats, what would you have?
PunchlinePlenty of milk.
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Joke #8
Why do dairy farmers never have to cut the grass?
PunchlineBecause they have plenty of lawn-mooers.
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Joke #9
Where did the pioneers keep their pigs?
PunchlineIn hog cabins.
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Joke #13
What do you call a pig thief?
PunchlineA hamburglar.
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Joke #14
What's the best way to keep milk from turning sour?
PunchlineLeave it inside the cow.
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Joke #15
What did the dog take when he was run down?
PunchlineThe license number of the car that hit him.
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Joke #17
What goes peck, bang, peck, bang, peck, bang?
PunchlineA bunch of chickens in a room filled with balloons.
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Joke #18
How do you take a pig to the hospital?
PunchlineIn a hambulance.
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Joke #20
What do you get if you feed gunpowder to a chicken?
PunchlineAn egg-splosion.
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Joke #21
What has four legs and flies?
PunchlineA pig.
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Joke #26
What do you call a clever duck?
PunchlineA wise quacker.
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Joke #29
How do you know that owls are smarter than chickens?
PunchlineHave you ever heard of Kentucky Fried Owl?
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Joke #35
What do you call a cat that has just eaten a whole duck?
PunchlineA duck-filled fatty puss.
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Joke #40
Why did the cow buy a new MP3 player?
PunchlineBecause she loves listening to moosic.
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Joke #44
What game do cows play at parties?
PunchlineMoosical chairs.
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Joke #45
What do you give a pony with a cold?
PunchlineCough stirrup.
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Joke #47
Why did the farmer take his cow dancing?
PunchlineHe was in the mood for a milkshake.
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Joke #59
Why did the dog's owner think his dog was a great mathematician?
PunchlineWhen he asked the dog what six minus six was, the dog said nothing.
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Joke #60
What did the snail say when she rode on the turtle's back?
PunchlineWheeeeeee!
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Joke #61
Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund?
PunchlineHe wanted to get a long little doggie.
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Joke #63
Why is a chipmunk braver than a hen?
PunchlineBecause the chipmunk isn't chicken.
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Joke #69
If you put 20 tigers, 10 gorillas, and 1 elephant in your kitchen, what do you have?
PunchlineA very large kitchen.
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Joke #71
What did the grape say when the elephant stood on it?
PunchlineNothing, it just let out a little wine.
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Joke #73
What did the dog tell his owner when he saw the dogcatcher coming?
PunchlineNothing. Dogs don't talk.
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Joke #78
What do you get if you cross a snake and a pig?
PunchlineA boar constrictor.
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Joke #82
Why didn't the boy advertise in the paper when his dog was lost?
PunchlineHis dog never reads the paper.
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Joke #84
What's gray, carries a bunch of flowers, and cheers you up when you are sick?
PunchlineA get wellephant.
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Joke #87
Why is a dog like a baseball player?
PunchlineHe runs for home when he sees the catcher coming.
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Joke #99
Why wasn't the dog hurt when he fell off a 100-foot ladder?
PunchlineHe fell from the bottom rung.
Pet Punchlines 23 jokes
Dogs, cats, mice, and the pets that run the house.
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Joke #24
Why did the dog take a bag of oats to bed at night?
PunchlineTo feed his nightmares.
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Joke #28
What kind of dog chases anything red?
PunchlineA bull dog.
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Joke #30
What is the cat's favorite TV show?
PunchlineThe evening mews.
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Joke #36
What do you get if you cross a frog and a dog?
PunchlineA croaker spaniel.
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Joke #39
What did the Dalmatian say after a big meal?
PunchlineThat hit the spots.
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Joke #43
What does a cat call a bowl of mice?
PunchlineA purrfect meal.
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Joke #46
Why was the cat so small?
PunchlineBecause it only ate condensed milk.
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Joke #51
How are cats like coins?
PunchlineThey have a head on one end and a tail on the other.
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Joke #52
What have 12 legs, six eyes, three tails and can't see?
PunchlineThree blind mice.
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Joke #55
What do cats read in the morning?
PunchlineMewspapers.
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Joke #58
What does a twenty-pound mouse say to a cat?
PunchlineHere kitty, kitty, kitty.
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Joke #64
What did the cat do after he swallowed some cheese?
PunchlineHe waited by the mouse hole with baited breath.
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Joke #75
Why do dogs run in circles?
PunchlineBecause it's hard to run in squares.
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Joke #77
What is a mouse's favorite game?
PunchlineHide and squeak.
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Joke #79
Why did the cat sleep under the car?
PunchlineBecause she wanted to wake up oily.
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Joke #80
How many hairs are in a dog's tail?
PunchlineNone. They are all on the outside.
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Joke #85
What do you do if your dog eats your pen?
PunchlineUse a pencil instead.
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Joke #89
What do dogs have that no other animal has?
PunchlinePuppies.
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Joke #91
What do you call a mouse that can pick up an elephant?
PunchlineSir.
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Joke #92
What's gray and furry on the inside and white on the outside?
PunchlineA mouse sandwich.
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Joke #93
Why do dogs lie down?
PunchlineThey can't lie up.
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Joke #95
Why does a dog scratch himself?
PunchlineHe is the only one that knows where it itches.
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Joke #98
Why is a dog so warm in summer?
PunchlineHe wears a coat and pants.
Wild Laughs 25 jokes
Elephants, lions, snakes, dinosaurs, and jungle-sized jokes.
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Joke #3
How does an elephant get out of a small car?
PunchlineThe same way that he got in.
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Joke #4
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
PunchlineLost.
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Joke #12
Why do elephants have wrinkly ankles?
PunchlineBecause their shoes are too tight.
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Joke #16
What's blue and has big ears?
PunchlineAn elephant at the North Pole.
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Joke #27
What's gray with red spots?
PunchlineAn elephant with the measles.
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Joke #31
What do snakes have written on their bath towels?
PunchlineHiss and Hers.
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Joke #32
What's the difference between an elephant and a piece of paper?
PunchlineYou can't do your homework on an elephant.
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Joke #41
What's big and gray and lives in a lake in Scotland?
PunchlineThe Loch Ness Elephant.
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Joke #42
What happened to the elephant who ran away with the circus?
PunchlineThe police made him bring it back.
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Joke #48
What do you get if you cross a snake and a Lego set?
PunchlineA boa constructor.
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Joke #49
What snakes are good at math?
PunchlineAdders.
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Joke #50
Which hand would you use to pick up a dangerous snake?
PunchlineSomeone else's.
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Joke #53
What's a snake's favorite song?
PunchlineSnake, Rattle, and Roll.
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Joke #56
What do you call a scared dinosaur?
PunchlineA nervous rex.
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Joke #65
How do you raise a baby elephant?
PunchlineWith a fork lift.
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Joke #66
Why do elephants have flat feet?
PunchlineFrom jumping out of tall trees.
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Joke #67
Why did the giant ape climb up the side of the skyscraper?
PunchlineThe elevator was broken.
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Joke #68
How do you make a green gorilla?
PunchlineCross a blue gorilla with a yellow one.
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Joke #74
What do you name an elephant that lies across the middle of a tennis court?
PunchlineAnnette.
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Joke #76
What's gray, has a wand and huge wings, and gives money to young elephants?
PunchlineThe tusk fairy.
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Joke #81
What's gray and lights up?
PunchlineAn electric elephant.
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Joke #86
What's big and gray with horns?
PunchlineAn elephant marching band.
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Joke #88
What's the difference between an injured elephant and a thunderstorm?
PunchlineOne roars with pain and the other pours with rain.
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Joke #94
What's the best way to see a charging herd of elephants?
PunchlineOn television.
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Joke #97
What's gray and beautiful and wears glass slippers?
PunchlineCinderelephant.
Ocean Giggles 6 jokes
Fish, dolphins, turtles, and jokes from below the surface.
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Joke #2
How do fish get to school?
PunchlineThey ride the octobus.
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Joke #10
What kind of fish will help you hear better?
PunchlineA herring aid.
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Joke #11
Why did the turtle cross the road?
PunchlineTo get to the shell station.
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Joke #57
Who granted the fish's wish?
PunchlineThe Fairy Cod Mother.
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Joke #70
What is a dolphin's favorite TV show?
PunchlineWhale Of Fortune.
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Joke #90
What is an octopus's favorite song?
PunchlineI Wanna Hold Your Hand, Hand, Hand, Hand, Hand, Hand, Hand, Hand.
Little Creatures, Big Laughs 15 jokes
Birds, frogs, bugs, and every creature still roaming the trail.
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Joke #6
Which bird is always out of breath?
PunchlineA puffin.
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Joke #19
Why did the owl howl?
PunchlineBecause the woodpecker would peck her.
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Joke #22
What do you give a sick bird?
PunchlineMedical tweetment.
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Joke #23
What is a polygon?
PunchlineA dead parrot.
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Joke #25
What kind of shoes do frogs like?
PunchlineOpen toad sandals.
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Joke #33
What bird steals from the rich to give to the poor?
PunchlineRobin Hood.
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Joke #34
Why do birds fly south for the winter?
PunchlineBecause it's too far to walk.
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Joke #37
What flies through the jungle singing opera?
PunchlineThe Parrots of Penzance.
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Joke #38
Why did the salamander feel lonely?
PunchlineBecause he was newt to the area.
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Joke #54
What's a toad's favorite ballet?
PunchlineSwamp Lake.
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Joke #62
What is a frog's favorite warm drink?
PunchlineHot croako.
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Joke #72
What's a frog's favorite candy?
PunchlineLollihops.
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Joke #83
What goes dot-dot-croak, dot-dash-croak?
PunchlineMorse Toad.
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Joke #96
Why was the frog sad?
PunchlineHe was unhoppy.
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Joke #100
Why does a stork stand on one leg?
PunchlineBecause it would fall over if it lifted the other one.