Read 101 clean Christmas jokes for kids and adults. Share Santa, elf, reindeer, and snowman puns, then print our top 12 or choose your own favorites.
Share 101 clean Christmas jokes with kids, grown-ups, families, and classrooms. Read Santa, elf, reindeer, snowman, tree, and holiday food jokes with every punchline included.
Print your favorite Christmas jokes
Use the Print the top 12 button for a one-page joke sheet. You can also select any jokes to build a personal printable, or print all 101 jokes. The print preview includes questions and answers, and you can choose Save as PDF in your browser's print dialog.
Santa Christmas jokes
Special delivery: a sack of laughs.
What do you call Santa when he stops moving?
Santa Pause.
Why does Santa go down the chimney?
Because it soots him.
What do you get when you cross Santa with a duck?
A Christmas quacker!
What does Santa use to measure things?
A Santa-meter.
Why did Santa put a clock in his sleigh?
He wanted to make good time.
What is Santa's favorite kind of music?
Wrap music.
Why did Santa take a gardening class?
To improve his ho-ho-hoe skills.
What does Santa call his pet cat?
Santa Claws.
Why did Santa bring a pencil to Christmas dinner?
To draw the gravy boat.
What do you call Santa on the beach?
Sandy Claus.
Which of Santa's friends is best at keeping time?
Saint Tick-olas.
What does Santa eat for breakfast?
Frosted flakes.
Why did Santa bring an umbrella to the workshop?
The forecast called for a shower of gifts.
Where does Santa keep his spare change?
In a snow bank.
Why is Santa good at solving puzzles?
He always finds the missing Claus.
What did Santa say when his calendar filled up?
That's a wrap for December!
Why did Santa sit next to the fireplace?
He wanted to get fired up for Christmas.
Elves & the workshop Christmas jokes
Little helpers. Big punchlines.
What do elves learn in school?
The elf-abet.
What do elves use to take pictures?
An elfie stick.
Why did the elf bring a ladder to work?
To reach the next level of toy making.
What do you call an elf who sings?
A wrapper with a great voice.
What kind of photos do elves take?
Elfies!
Why did the elf put wheels on a dictionary?
To get the word out faster.
What do elves use to clean Santa's sleigh?
Santa-tizer.
Why did the elf wear headphones while wrapping?
To get into the Christmas groove.
What did the elf say to the tangled ribbon?
Let's knot make this difficult.
Why was the toy train invited to the workshop meeting?
It had a good track record.
What kind of bread do elves make?
Shortbread.
Why did the elf bring a ruler to the party?
To see how long the fun would last.
What is an elf's favorite sport?
Miniature golf.
What did the elf name the new wrapping machine?
Sir Wraps-a-Lot.
What do elves say when they finish wrapping a box?
That's a wrap!
What did the elf say after fixing the toy trumpet?
Now that's something to toot about!
What do elves drive to work?
A Toy-ota.
Reindeer Christmas jokes
Ready, set, sleigh!
What do reindeer say before telling a joke?
This one will sleigh you!
Why did Rudolph bring a flashlight?
His nose wanted a night off.
What is a reindeer's favorite game at a party?
Stable tennis.
Why did the reindeer take music lessons?
To get better at hoof-beats.
How much does it cost to park Santa's sleigh?
Nothing. It's on the house.
What do you call a reindeer with no manners?
Rude-olph.
Why did the reindeer wear bells?
Because their antlers didn't ring.
What is Rudolph's favorite ice cream?
Deer-y free.
Why did the reindeer bring a notebook on the flight?
To jot down some high-flying ideas.
Why did the reindeer cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off.
Why was the reindeer good at basketball?
It had a great jump shot.
What do reindeer put on their sandwiches?
Deer-licious toppings.
Why did Rudolph join the school play?
He was ready for the spotlight.
What did the reindeer say about the new sleigh?
It has plenty of leg room, but no antler room!
Why did the reindeer check the weather twice?
To avoid a rain-deer delay.
What did Santa's sleigh say after a long flight?
That was snow problem.
Snowmen & winter Christmas jokes
Cool jokes for warm company.
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Ice Krispies.
What do you call a snowman in summer?
A puddle.
How does a snowman get to school?
By icicle.
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Why did the snowman look through the carrots?
He was picking his nose.
What do you call a snowman who tells stories?
A snow-and-tell expert.
What do you call a party for snowmen?
A snowball.
What is a snowman's favorite kind of birthday cake?
One with plenty of frosting.
Why did the snowman bring a broom to the party?
To sweep everyone off their feet.
What did the snowman say to the pushy sun?
Can you chill for a minute?
Where do snowmen keep their money?
In a freezer account.
Why did the snowman become a detective?
He was great at following cold trails.
What do you call a snowman having a bad day?
A meltdown waiting to happen.
What kind of lunch does a snowman pack?
Iceberg lettuce wraps.
Why did the snowman join the choir?
He had a very cool voice.
What did the mitten say to the scarf?
I've got to hand it to you. You really wrap things up.
Why did the snowman stare at the calendar?
He was waiting for a snow day.
Trees & presents Christmas jokes
Good laughs, all wrapped up.
Why are Christmas trees so bad at knitting?
They keep dropping their needles.
What did the ornament say to the Christmas tree?
Thanks for letting me hang out.
Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?
It needed a little trim.
What do you call a Christmas tree that knows karate?
Spruce Lee.
What do you get when you put a bell on a skunk?
Jingle smells!
Why did the present go to school?
To become a little more gifted.
What did the ribbon say after a busy Christmas?
I'm all tied up.
Why did the Christmas lights get good grades?
They were bright students.
What is a Christmas tree's favorite candy?
Orna-mints.
What did the star say when it reached the treetop?
Things are looking up!
Why did the stocking go to music school?
It wanted to be a sock star.
What did the empty box say on Christmas morning?
I've got a great present-ation.
Why did the tinsel take a nap?
It was worn out from hanging around.
What did one gift tag say to the other?
You can count on me to stick with you.
Why did the Christmas wreath win a prize?
It had a well-rounded design.
What did the wrapping paper say to the scissors?
Cut it out. I'm trying to keep this a surprise!
What does a Christmas tree use to get online?
A pine-fi connection.
Treats & carols Christmas jokes
Something sweet. Something silly.
What do gingerbread people sleep on?
Cookie sheets.
Why did the gingerbread person go to the doctor?
They were feeling crumby.
What does a gingerbread person put on their bed?
A warm layer of icing.
Why did the candy cane win the race?
It took a sweet shortcut.
What did the marshmallow say to the hot chocolate?
I melt every time we meet.
Why did the Christmas cookie bring a sweater?
There was a chill in the cookie jar.
What do you get when you cross a Christmas cookie with a detective?
Sherlock Crumbs.
Why did the peppermint get invited to dinner?
It was in mint condition.
Why did the Christmas cookie sit by the computer?
It wanted more bytes.
Why did the carolers take a ladder?
To reach the high notes.
What did the bell say when it was asked to sing?
I'll give it a ring.
Why did the choir bring a pencil to rehearsal?
To make a few notes.
What do you call a group of singing Christmas trees?
A fir-midable choir.
What is a sheep's favorite Christmas song?
Fleece Navidad.
What did the cookie say when someone told it a Christmas joke?
You're cracking me up!
What did the cocoa say to the spoon?
Thanks for stirring up some holiday cheer.
Why did everyone invite the Christmas joke book?
It always brought the ho-ho-whole family together.
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