75 Jokes for kids that make you laugh!

Kid Jokes kids-jokes jeffprongo 0

  • Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? Of course! The Empire State Building can’t jump!
  • How can you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator? By the footprints in the butter!
  • If April showers bring Mayflowers, what do Mayflowers bring? Pilgrims!
  • What can you catch but not throw? A cold!
  • What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming? “Here come the grapes!” (She was colorblind.)
  • What did one hat say to the other? Stay here, I’m going on ahead.
  • What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming? “Here come the elephants!”
  • What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
  • What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop!
  • What falls in winter but never gets hurt? The snow!
  • What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck!
  • What has hands but can’t clap? A clock!
  • What is brown and sticky? A stick!
  • What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers!
  • What side of a turkey has the most feathers? The outside!
  • Where do fish keep their money? In the river bank!
  • Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go!
  • Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
  • Why did the elephant paint himself in different colors? So he could hide in the crayon box!
  • Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken’s foot!
  • Why did the man run around his bed? Because he was trying to catch up on his sleep!
  • Why did the math book look so sad? Because it had so many problems!
  • Why did the picture go to jail? It was framed!
  • Why did the teacher put on sunglasses? Because her students were so bright!
  • Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs!
  • Why do sharks swim in saltwater? Because pepper water makes them sneeze!
  • How can you tell if someone is a good farmer? He is outstanding in his field!
  • How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity? Shocked!
  • How do all the oceans say hello to each other? They wave!
  • How do mountains stay warm in winter? Snowcaps
  • How do you keep a bull from charging? Take away its credit card!
  • How do you keep an elephant from charging? Take away her credit card!
  • How do you know if there’s an elephant under your bed? Your head hits the ceiling!
  • How do you make a lemon drop? Just let go of it!
  • What animal needs to wear a wig? A bald eagle!
  • What did one plate say to the other? Dinner is on me!
  • What did one wall say to the other wall? I’ll meet you at the corner!
  • What did the frog order for lunch? A burger and a diet croak!
  • What did the traffic light say to the truck? Don’t look! I’m changing!
  • What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
  • What do cows order from? Cattle-logs!
  • What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
  • What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean meat!
  • What do you call a dog that can tell time? A watchdog!
  • What do you call a flower that runs on electricity? A power plant!
  • What do you call a fly without wings? A walk!
  • What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.
  • What do you call a man with a shovel? Doug.
  • What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
  • What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!
  • What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
  • What do you call the horse that lives next door? Your neighbor!
  • What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire Frostbite!
  • What does an evil hen lay? Deviled eggs!
  • What has a ton of ears but can’t hear a thing? A cornfield.
  • What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck!
  • What is the difference between elephants and grapes? The grapes are purple.
  • What is the witch’s favorite school subject? Spelling!
  • What kind of haircuts do bees get? Buzzzzcuts!
  • What kind of room doesn’t have doors? A mushroom!
  • What’s the difference between broccoli and boogers? Kids don’t eat broccoli!
  • Where do cows go for entertainment? To the moo-vies!
  • Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him!
  • Which hand is better to write with? Neither. It’s better to write with a pencil!
  • Why are elephants so wrinkled? Because they take too long to iron!
  • Why are ghosts, bad liars? Because you can see right through them!
  • Why can’t a person’s nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be afoot!
  • Why couldn’t the pony sing in the choir? Because she was a little horse!
  • Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? Because he wanted to see time fly!
  • Why did the cookie go to the nurse? Because he felt crummy!
  • Why did the teddy bear not want any dessert? Because she was stuffed!
  • Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs!
  • Why should you never trust a pig with a secret? Because it’s bound to squeal.
  • Knock knock. Who’s there? A little old lady? A little old lady who? I didn’t know you could yodel!
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cows go. Cows go who? No, cows go MOO!